When you are responsible for running billion dollar divisions there is always a need to keep your skills sharp and your career aim focused. That is not to say that women executives are dominating the top companies because they are not. In this study their own data concluded that  “More than half the employees at the NAFE Top Companies are women, but they still make up less than a quarter of the corporate executives.“

Career counselling participation for Executive women can help shape not only their career or educational path but can support discussion surrounding issues like:

* Work life/ balance

* Flexible work schedule implementation

* Addressing grievances

* Provides solution based counsel; advancing learning and understanding of self

* Becomes a motivator to go beyond current status; embrace new roles

Career counselling is not something you engage in only in the first stage of your professional life. It should be incorporated throughout your career, as we all know there are decisions and circumstances that change our perspective on work and life. To seek out privately the assistance of a career counsellor or participate in company programs that offer this service is most likely the best investment one can make. Competition is tight no matter where you see yourself on the career ladder, it makes all the sense in the world to go where the answers are to your success.

Recently, I spoke with someone who had graduated from high school about two years ago. As a career practitioner in the private sector I wondered just how much information was provided prior to graduation, that helped her plan her education or find a job. Her response: “I wasn’t prepared out of high school.”

She explained, “I didn’t get enough information on what jobs are out there. You take biology and harder courses, they gear you to take these courses which I guess can make you prepared for something? What she wasn’t prepared to answer was what to do with those courses. “What are you going to do? I never got information about the types of jobs.”

In fact, the schools set these kids up from Grade 10 onward to start picking courses for some imaginary future job. One assessment may be offered and off they go picking their course structure. I remember that same approach during my junior and high school years and that was a long time ago. With no resources, basic resume understanding and no clue as to what is happening out there in the real world (and how that relates to their abilities or interests), many young adults flounder around trying to discover what is next.

There is so much to share with them and it is in their best interest that they receive it before the stress levels get higher. In fact, this young woman spoke to that very stress in our talk. Paraphrasing her passionate response: You see others going off to school and then you see some dropping out of college because it wasn’t right for them. You see friends with jobs and others without. It is a confusing time and you put pressure on yourself to figure out what are YOU going to do.

It is time for these graduates to get more of what the general public has access to from a career consultant, counsellor or coach. When my adult students come through one to one or group sessions they come away feeling empowered, they can plan better for their future and they understand the job market in a whole new way. Self discovery, proper planning, supportive resources and better decision making are important pieces in the process. Shouldn’t our students in high school receive the same quality of information?

There are two traps kids (and parents) fall into post high school:

1. Trying to look for work without a proper understanding of how to market their skills.

2. Applying for courses or programs without proper analysis of their interest or the viability of their choice.

In both cases, the outcomes usually are that self esteem plummets because of lack of success, plus time and money is wasted. We are not teaching our children proper planning for their careers nor providing necessary life skills for a successful transition from school to the working world.

Everyone always say’s “I wish had learned this career planning when I was younger, it would have saved me a lot of time and maybe I would have got into something that I actually like to do. I say, “I wish you would have had this too, but now you know better, you can do better by finding the job or taking the course that makes sense for you.”

I’m going to be putting together graduation packages for parents to give their children. Helpful advice one on one that can make a huge difference in their career/educational planning and job search. I want to help young adults start out on the right foot upon completion of high school. If you want more information on this service email me directly.

Pride in its truest definition would not remotely conjure up images of sadness, low self esteem or holding back on decisions. Instead, it is described as relating to self with high importance, self respect, true to position or character, pleasure and satisfaction. With that in mind, it is doesn’t matter which way you want to say it, having pride or being proud is not what is getting in the way of obtaining help or success. It is that human emotion called FEAR. I have spoke often about that emotion in the context of my work and in my personal life as I see how much it impacts us all. However, just as I speak to the issues of fear and low self esteem, I equally have to set the record straight surrounding the use of pride in the equation.

Unemployment, for example, is one of those equations. Pride should not be the excuse that we give when our inability to get what we need is based on too little information and debilitating fear. Fear takes over and then any advice or information given will most likely fall on deaf ears. As family members or friends we can find ourselves in an  enabling position, trying to break through, fill in the gaps, offering suggestions, sharing websites and talking about what Susan or Brad did to get out of their rut. Still the fear persists. Being unemployed, underemployed or just plain sick of the current job is not likely to change unless we are willing to get out of the way of ourselves and get to the root of the problem(s).

Everyone needs something or someone to help prop up the spirit, provide clarity, inject experience or perspective, to be a resource. There is no weakness in accessing that support or information; it is how the world operates. We are interdependent on each other for goods, services and companionship. We are never in a position to be the experts on everything and therefore need to build a team. We can still work individually on most life and career matters but we pull in what is necessary when the situation calls for it.

So, my advice is that we call it like it is and say it loud:

It is not pride that is holding me back it is fear! I’m scared that this is all there is. I’m scared about having to talk to people I don’t know. I’m scared about trying to write a resume and cover letter. I’m scared about the prospect of doing an interview. I’m scared about all the things I don’t know. I’m scared about repeating the same mistakes and getting into a job I will hate. I’m scared that I’m too old and nobody will want to hire me. I’m scared I have no value after all this time away from work. I’m scared of going back to school. I’m scared…. and…. I’m tired.

Now, my friend, it is time to ask for help because you have nothing to lose by doing so. There are plenty of people out there with the expertise and know how to get you beyond all of this and back on track. Yes, you have to be selective. There a lot of people calling themselves career coaches who are missing very key areas of expertise; just because I have experienced career transitioning does not make me a career practitioner. (In a later blog I will be explaining just what you want to ask coaches before beginning that partnership) Yes, you may have to make a few calls or emails to get to the right person but in the end it is a hell of a lot better to bounce things off of someone in the day time hours than to be spending another sleepless night trapped inside your own head.

Contact a Certified Career Development Practitioner and be willing to do the work necessary to get from where you are now, to the other side… fulfilling your potential and reflecting with pride on what you have accomplished.

If careers are the sum total of your life experiences then the resume is just the written version of that story. However, most would agree that generating a picture of your life experiences, for a resume or cover letter, can be a daunting process. Especially, if you don’t know what to leave in or leave out or what questions to ask. However, there are great tips and tricks to flush out the information that can help you create a resume that best reflects your skills and accomplishments.

First thing you want to do is start a list that includes:

* Previous employment – No matter how far back it goes just write it down. You may or may not reference it in a resume but the skills are potentially notable and transferable.

* Volunteer experience – Paid or unpaid, all work counts.

* Recreational activities – What do you do for fun?

* Academic background – List formal education. Also, add learning that took place outside of a formal educational environment. Include: continuing education, self study, online courses, tele-seminars, company specific professional development.

* Turning points – Reflect on turning points in your life and note examples.

* Accomplishments and Goals – List past accomplishments and future goals.

Once you have finished going over your list, pass it along to someone else you trust  and see if they have anything to add. Often we forget or don’t recognize all the things we have done and having an extra set of eyes on our experience often yields more information to add to our work and skill search.

With each of the above lists you can pull out even more valuable insights. Take yourself through an experience, job or day and ask yourself:

* What did I do?

* What did I learn from that experience, course or job?

* What did I enjoy and why?

* What did I dislike and why?

* What did I accomplish and how?

* What new tools or equipment did I use?

* What positive feedback or awards did I receive from others?

Armed with all of this you can now begin the process of resume development. Of course, you may need some assistance in understanding the structure and type of resume that will work best for you but there are plenty of resources within your community and through private coaching, books and online sources. (Be aware: some sources, in particular online may be out of date or not relevant to your geographical area or field) Seeking advice is highly recommended.

For our young worker and stay at home Mom it became abundantly clear that by answering these questions there was a lot of marketable skills to promote, new references to add and an idea of where to target their resumes. The confidence they gained was evident with each new piece. They saw just how much they have contributed on a daily basis, how much value they had to offer, they could see what makes them unique. Best of all, they now had the language to describe how others may benefit from their experience.

Here is an excerpt from a card I received that was entitled “Thankful Me…”

“Thank you for a learning experience I will keep forever. You helped me change my future and I am truly grateful.” JM

I share JM’s words with you so that you see the power and hope that emerges from uncovering your experience and the connection it has to self esteem. It is hard work, I know, but the gains are immense. From a work search perspective your story is what separates you from all other applicants; there is no other like you! Knowing how to incorporate your life experience into a resume, cover letter or interview is one more tool for you to use that will make you stand out of the crowd. If you have any questions around this please feel free to email me or provide a question or comment below.

You have probably experienced a situation where someone is trying to do an activity, slowly, methodically or even incorrectly from your perspective and your first instinct is to step in and do it yourself. Maybe, you recognized something needs to be said and you want to tell a person just how you feel or what you think but, you resist because you don’t believe they are strong enough to hear it. Sometimes you may even feel that your feelings are not valid or your time precious in comparison to others. So, off you go saying “Yes” without ever considering the dynamic you have just set up for yourself and your relationship with the other person or persons. Rescuer’s are in each of those examples.

Some rescuer’s can feel a sense of superiority to the person they are attempting to rescue. Have you ever heard yourself saying, “They need me, without my help where would they be?” It is not uncommon for that to spiral into resentment or persecution of others when you don’t feel your efforts were appreciated. Through your need to be needed, family members, colleagues at work or community acquaintances learn to be dependent on your pattern of assistance.

Whatever the scenario, it is helpful to ask yourself:

What roles do I take on?

Why do I believe it is my responsibility to rescue others?

Is there a difference in the the people I tend to rescue? (Age? Gender? Demonstrating bias towards or against individuals)

What do I gain?

Exploring your motivation for being a rescuer is an important piece in the goal to letting go. Often when you come to understand Who? What? and Why? you also learn that rescuing is more to serve yourself rather than others. Even if your intention is to be helpful, it may not be the healthiest approach. People can feel like they are not capable or worthy if you keep stepping in. They don’t learn new skills such as communication or assertiveness. There is an isolation that can occur especially if they see others working on similar problems successfully using their own hands or critical thinking. Even feelings of anger can emerge because of lack of control and powerlessness. Learned helplessness is not what you want to pass along.

If you want to break the need to rescue, try the following:

1. Encourage others to do things for themselves. Give information and show them possibilities; let them go from there. Provide positive reinforcement.

2. Believe in others’ abilities to learn and help themselves. Don’t make assumptions that they can’t do either.

3. Do no more than 50% of the work in any relationship. We teach people how to treat us; believe that you deserve as much respect and equal treatment as they do.

4. Drop the superiority complex. Your way is not the right way or the only way. People will survive without you and must be allowed to experience life lessons.

5. Set boundaries. When you set boundaries for your time and relationships you are far less likely to fall into the rescue trap.

Break the need to rise to the rescue position. Instead, step outside of that role and into an equal relationship with everyone you meet. I guarantee many people will benefit from the new you.