I agree with you about TV taping too, I hadn’t thought of that one for this post. I too, when I have been in that situation, concentrate on the interviewer; keenly interested on the questions and thoughts. Let everyone else do their job around the set.

Butterflies can teach us many things about ourselves and in that I think they deserve their place. Like anything though if it is debilitating, it needs to be addressed. Life is full of awkward moments, mistimed steps and words that are misconstrude.

I will share my worst butterfly moments… when I’m about to sing. I sang for years in public but one day I made a mistake on stage and since then when I am about to sing the nervousness goes nuts. All of the symptoms come back, terrified my voice barely does what I want it to do. Butterflies aren’t even the half of it. Sad really, something I will have to work on, practise what I preach. Maybe one day I will blog about it further.

Thanks Pat for your comment.

So you asked how do we deal with them:

Everyone has different ways to deal with this, I believe wholeheartedly in the breath/meditation. Often before doing something that is causing such a reaction I take minutes to meditate and breath. By concentrating on my breath I relieve some pressure.

I listened to music or something that soothes me. If I’m at home, I use the adrenaline more productively with a short workout.

Job interviews, practise is key. My students/clients through practise and understanding what the questions are designed for, often find relief from some of the nervousness. Like first aid, once you know why and how you just go into do mode without thinking hard about the what ifs. The interview is a mutual exchange and is based on mutual needs, we are not better than each other we both have something the other may want.

I agree with Pat’s response with public speaking, focus on faces that seem encouraging and interested. Practise comes into play here too.

Generally, I assess what my fear is and remind myself that people really don’t care as much as I think they do. They don’t remember half of what I think they will. A stare may only be someone resting their eyes on me but thinking something completely different. I am my own worst enemy most of the time. Each of these realizations lessens the duration of the flight of the butterflies. Not perfect but a work in progress.

I often say, “self they have asked you to speak to them, so that mens that they likely think that you know more than they do, or that your presence, words and opinion are valued..”
That often works for me.

If it is a TV taping, I firmly keep my eye and attention on the interviewer and let the cameraman/woman, do the moving around.

If I am speaking in a hall or to a large group, I will often focus on one or two people in the audience, who look friendly and encourage some audience interaction to break the ice and establish possible common ground.
(I often used to ask Jennifer accompany me to public talks, she is very good with people and can often pick up subliminal feelings and atmosphere.)

As for being summoned by a boss…I often get butterflies with that one.
But I find it helps to imagine how I would cope with the worst case scenario and work down from there…It then does not seem so bad, after that.