Happy Birthday Duchess
I would like to share with you a special but reflective day for me. Part of me realizes that some people may find it odd to celebrate the birthday for a life already lost, I do not. I gave this birth date, February 28th, to my dog Duchess because nobody knew exactly what month she was born but they did know with some certainty the year, 1991. She past away in late August 2007 and every day since I still think about her.
Losing your pet can be devastating especially in the beginning, the tears that flow burn your cheeks and you truly do not know what to do with yourself. After spending 15 years with my Duchess there was a routine established, conversation (she was a good listener:) and play. The care of her was always my focus, I built my life around her well-being and I was rewarded one hundred times over.
Today, would have been a day to awake as always with me cupping my hands around her fuzzy face and giving her a big smooch on the forehead. A little Happy Birthday would be the song of the day and she would love the attention. You would know she was enjoying herself not only by the hops and huffs, but she had a face that gave you expressions. She would let you know if she was enjoying her experience or not. Since this day appealed to her need to be the center of attention, the smile was obvious.
I was pretty strict on her diet because even when I first received her from the city pound, they explained that she was allergic to certain foods. Even the pound-keeper had bought her a different bag of food than the others to accommodate her specific needs. With all the accommodations and attention she received you now know why I gave her the royal name of Duchess. On her birthday though her diet included even more of her favourite treats, cheese and ice cream.
Receiving ice cream at any other time of year meant licking what was left in our bowls, or a little dab for her to chase around in hers. For many years though, birthday ice-cream meant a trip to Dairy Queen where I would order the baby size coned. The Drive-thru staff would love to see Duchess hanging out the back window with the excitement for her impending good fortune. I would hold on to the cone while she devoured it, it always amazed me that dogs must not get brain freeze.
This whole month I have been aware this day was coming, a day to celebrate her birth and life but I miss her love. A dogs love in unlike any other, it is the kind of love I do not believe humans can give to each other easily.
As many of you pet parents out there will know, they are our confidants and we can be sure in the knowledge that what was said remains between us two. No matter how bad our days become or the changes that come upon us, at our side is that precious soul. What you look like or dress like means nothing to them. They don’t seek out another, you are worthy of their love and devotion and they will protect you no matter what. To know them is to know unconditional love; they are yours and you theirs until the last breath.
Many times I dream about Duchess, we play and she hangs out with me in whatever I am doing in that dream. Sometimes I have to save her, sometimes she has to save me. I have had dreams where she comes up on my bed and lays at the foot of it and others where she is beside the bed staring at me like she used to do. I’m so happy when I get to hold her in my dreams, sometimes it was like I could really feel her and smell her. Amazing what the brain can do to conjure up those experiences. I am so thankful after all this time to still have those moments.
So, HAPPY BIRTHDAY MY PRECIOUS BABY BEAR! I LOVE YOU DUCHESS. Thank you still for your presence in my life, thank you for all the years you gave me, you are with me always.
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A picture says a thousand words, and your love and devotion towards Duchess was certainly evident in the picture of the two of you. Happy birthday Duchess.
Thank you for sharing such a personal story and private place in your heart.
Having adopted an abandoned puppy almost 14 years ago who is most recently began to need more regular medical care, I found your bond with Duchess to closely parallel the bond I have with my princess, Roo. She has had several scary moments over the past few years that have started me to wondering how I can prepare myself for the day she will no longer be here. I have inadvertently had thoughts about what it will be like without her around to acrobatically catch food I accidentally drop before it hits the floor; make the tick-tick-tick noise of her nails as she trots about busily – checking to see who might be trying to breach our fortress; or the persistence she can endlessly maintain while convincing me to reach under the couch and retrieve her favorite ball (typically during a movie).
Your story has made me realize that it is important to stop trying to guard my feelings against what will eventually happen, and open my heart up to enjoy and appreciate her as much as possible every single day I still have with her. So thank you Jennifer, for your thoughts on Duchess… and thank you Duchess for touching Jennifer’s life so deeply that she felt compelled to share your special bond with others.
My dear friend Jennifer. Thank you for the memories of Duchess. Bob and I also know the love these animals can bring and we have shared the loss of our cat, Kloppy as you know. This was Bob’s buddy and to this day he still has pictures of him at his bedside and at work. We also had Klopp for 15 years. It’s hard to let them go but we have precious memories through our photos.
I want to wish Duchess a belated HAPPY BIRTHDAY!….from her Auntie Mar
I hope that each of you received my thank you’s back. The comments were so appreciated, really beyond words. There are certain experiences in life that many people can share and understand. The loss of a beloved pet is one of them, and so I am thankful for the time taken to acknowledge that common bond.
Your Duchess really was a precious baby! What a beautiful girl. I am so happy that she comes to you in your dreams. How comforting to be able to hold her again. Once we have made a place in our hearts for a beloved pet, they will be with us always.
Thank you for the beautiful comment you left me. It was so nice to read because you clearly understand how I am feeling and my need to share Casey’s life and passing. It was very therapeutic to write about her. I hope to hold her again one night in my dreams!
Thank you for reading my post on Duchess. I agree that it was therapeutic to write about the love and memories we have with these precious souls. I’m sure you will feel Casey’s presence again; remain open to those moments as it is a comforting and wonderful time.